Rest in peace

I've been neglecting this. What was so simple and enjoyable when I was on my couch in snowy Minnesota seems to have faded along with all of my free time once I returned to my Boston brownstone. Nevertheless, I really want to keep this up - and I'm working on it! It's just... there are so many distractions! Yea, there's school - this semester has more busy work than I've had probably since my senior year of high school. It's kind of ridiculous, I actually have weekly assignments for the first time in two years. On top of trying to keep up with all of the readings. Thoroughly unpleasant.

As if I didn't waste enough of my time on classwork and extracurriculars (along with jobs/internships I'm desperately trying to find), I happen to have had a slight incident with the Twilight series. Nothing too serious, I promise. Sam was reading it and then finished it just in time for me to start when I was waiting for my printer to install. It's just... addicting. I've got two down, two to go, and I just don't know what to do with myself.

I'll be honest, I'm a little ashamed. I never really intended to get into them, just to read them for the experience. And it's not like I'm obsessed with them. I swear. Eugh. There's just some quality about them that hooks you in and creates this intense need to know what's going to happen. Even if you know, deep down, the way it'll end. It's the same thing with chick flicks and trashy romance novels, which I've also been known to give myself over to. And really, I think that's what Twilight is to me, basically. The vampires don't really make a difference - if I want those, I'll stick with Buffy and Spike, thank you. One friend of mine noted that Twilight fell short in her opinion because it tried to make it seem incredibly plausible that vampires were living next door and that you may fall in love with one at any second. This as opposed to the world created in Harry Potter where you knew you wouldn't be involved in any wizards. But I'm not sure that that's what pulls people into this phenomenon. Harry Potter hit everyone across age and gender barriers. I'm pretty sure that those afflicted by Twilight are mostly teen/young adult girls and those others susceptible to a tragic love story (ie. me, sap that I am). And really, I think afflicted is the right word - it's like having a 24 hour bug. And you can finish the books in that amount of time, if you're driven enough. But, as all teen obsessions do, many get transfixed for longer. In fact, my friend's 15-year-old sister told her that "any fiction other than Twilight just wasn't worthwhile." Eek! I wouldn't go that far at all, but it's certainly engaging... like a toned-down trashy romance novel. Only more dangerous. Kind of.

I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad

There are some things that, at 2 am the night before I leave, hold a huge level of curiousity over me. Right now? Behind my dresser in my room at home. A space seemingly long forgotten, a graveyard of artifacts that have tumbled into dusty obscurity. And while packing tonight I remembered my need to look back. So, armed with bare hands and a fear of reaching into a spider's home, I pushed back a set of drawers to explore behind the dresser.

And oh, did I find a lot of dust. I may have developed a dust allergy just from the time I spent back there. But I found a lot of things. Two notes passed between my best friend of the time and myself, noting jokes I still remember and crushes so terrible I must have blocked them out from my memory. I found a necklace given to me by another former best friend and actually remember opening up the oyster (which smelled terrible) to get the pearl. Two bobbleheads - Christian Guzman (whose head won't stay on) and Doug Mientkiewicz - both players during the Twins heyday, no longer with them, but signs of good times that were not really that long ago. A signed The Academy Is... poster, now hanging on my wall. I may not be the hugest TAI fan, but it was pretty awesome when I got it. That show, Something Corporate at the Quest my sophomore year of high school, was entirely fantastic. Almost like a relic from high school days, the club doesn't even exist anymore. The cast from when I broke my wrist in the 8th grade. Despite the ew factor, it's iteresting - signed by everyone I was friends with then, a lot of whom I'm not anymore. And by the people who worked in the Buckle - the store we frequented weekly, almost to a stalker point that year. Signal the nostalgia and pondering now. A souvenir cup from the bat mitzvah of a girl I haven't spoken to in at least 2 years, more Express tags than I knew I had clothes, a penny key chain from San Francisco and tons more.

I left the dresser for my bookshelf. Beyond the basics there are books from my childhool, bringing back memories of reading by the hallway light when I was definitely supposed to be asleep. My siddurim from Wheels and Pilgrimage, a copy of Are You My Mother? from my IGB overseer, a handmade scrapbook from an old friend who I definitely should get back in touch with. I always find it interesting to look back - not just to wax nostalgic, but to actually see the change. Hopefully it's for the better.