Hey, big spender

I'll be honest: sometimes I talk to inanimate objects. Or really, just people who aren't there - names on sheets of paper, like tonight when I'm just asking Eric to pick up the phone, or Joseph to donate some money, or cursing Lyle because his phone number is out of service and I really wanted him to repeat last year's $360 donation. There are only so many times that I can initial a sheet and mark it NH (not home) or PP (phone problem) before I get a little frustrated. Even more frustrating, though, can be when people actually do pick up the phone. So, I've compiled a list of things that irritate me about people on the phone.

1. Picking up your phone during dinner. It is quite possibly the most irritating thing you can do, especially if you don't know who's calling. If it's important, I'll leave a message. Or call back. I promise. There's no need for you to pick up the phone only to tell me I've interrupted your dinner and that youi're going to hang up on me now. Unnecessary.

2. People who don't pick up, but whose answering machines sound like they are. "Hi, long enough pause for me to start talking, we aren't home right now. And we wouldn't give you money anyway." Thanks, really.

3. People who are downright rude. I'm sorry if your husband's name is the one we have because he writes the checks and I don't know your name even though you're the BU alum. I apologize, really. We'll fix it in our database, but you don't need to be a bitch about it. And you should probably still give us money. And please, don't be mean to me. I'm trying to be as nice as possible while uncomfortably asking your for money when everyone is poor, so lighten up, okay?

4. Picking up your phone when you're actually one foot out the door. See above with picking up the phone during dinner. I'll call back, really. I do want your money, after all.

5. People who ask awkward questions. Last semester, a guy asked me who I was voting for. He continued (after I had told him I wasn't going to tell him who I voted for) to tell me that I had just voted to raise his taxes but, because he wasn't an SOB (his words, not mine) he'd still donate money. Excruciatingly uncomfortable. Really, are you that bored?

6. People who cut you off. Talking on the phone is just like driving - I don't want to be cut off in the middle of it. Fine if you don't want to donate money, but at least let me finish speaking first. I'm plenty comfortable with the rejection, just don't make me feel like an idiot by cutting me off midsentence. Please.

Even though people can be ridiculous, I do enjoy working in development. Three almost painless hours of calling and asking people for money, while relaxing in the office and hanging out with some friends. Not too terrible. Although today the person I was calling was dead. Incredibly uncomfortable, especially because I felt so terrible about it. But sometimes the calls are good and sometimes they're bad. With today's economy, a lot of the people I call actually do want to donate, but can't because they've been out of a job for the past nine months. And that's really hard to hear, and even tougher to imagine. It's the same thing I tell people who ask me how the fundraising's going - it's got its ups and its down, some better and worse than others.

On the bright side, things I like today about work:

1. Talking to nice people on the phone, especially those who want your advice. And then give donations. And parents of my friends who give donations on credit cards. Fabulous.

2. Rachel's (not me) Pandora playlist - featuring old music, once dearly loved.

3. Entertaining answering machines.

4. Big hitting nights: $569 in one night!

5. People who actually like being called. Yea, that's right.

Even though it was a successful night, I do still kind of miss the old Manhattanites I used to call. If they picked up, they donated big. And if not, they had awesome answering machines!